change

i keep trying to convince myself that it wont be this slow forever. once im in college and around people, ill actually get out and do stuff. i hope it wont be the case, but i think that i wont see the people that i went to high school with ever again once i graduate.

i keep saying to myself that this is only a part of my life and there will be more parts to happen. i want something that i can look forward to instead of thinking life will always be this way. things will change and i will be thankful for it.

sometimes i feel bad that i want to get away from my family but doesnt every teenager want freedom? freedom to do what you want, the freedom to live the way you choose, the freedom to be yourself. i want it all. im screaming for it. im open to a new adventure in life.

its almost sad to think that this stage of my life is almost over but then i think about all things that are out there waiting for me and i dont feel sad anymore. i hope that before i am dead, i will have had an adventure. i hope that i will say i have lived my life gloriously.

change is always scary. im absolutely terrified of the idea of college, but then im also so excited for it. i dont know how i can feel both the emotions at the same time. i just dont want to feel like that im all of a sudden being put out into the world by myself.